Letting Go

Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commandments.

Deuteronomy 7:9

This is the last weekend that I will have my youngest son at home until Christmas. (see the tears?)

Letting go of adult children is a struggle for all parents.

Biblically, we know that God takes the role of the parent very seriously.

Parents are to raise children in the “training and instruction of the Lord,” not frustrating or exasperating them (Ephesians 6:4). We are to “train a child in the way he should go” (Proverbs 22:6), giving him good gifts (Matthew 7:11), loving and disciplining him for his sake (Proverbs 13:24), and providing for his needs (1 Timothy 5:8).

At the heart of the difficulty of letting go of our children is a certain amount of fear - the world is a scary place, and the numerous stories of terrible things happening increase our fears.

Perhaps nothing on earth is more testing of our faith than the time when our children begin to sever the bonds that have held them close to us.

Letting go of children doesn’t mean simply turning them loose in the world to fend for themselves.

It means turning them over to our heavenly Father who loves them more than we ever could, and who guides and guards them according to His perfect will.

The reality is that they are His children; they belong to Him, not to us - He has loaned them to us for a while and given us instruction on how to care for them, but eventually, we have to give them back to Him and trust that He will love them and nurture their spirits in the same way we have nurtured them physically.

So what is the parents’ role as children become adults?

Certainly we never ‘let go’ of them in the sense of abandoning them.

We are still their parents and always will be.

Just because we no longer nurture and guard them physically, we are still concerned for their welfare.

Most importantly, we pray for them.

We encourage them in their walk with God, offering advice when asked, offer help if it is needed and accept their decision to receive it or reject it.

When parents finally do let go of adult children, they often find a stronger, deeper, and more fulfilling relationship than they ever could have imagined.
Now if I could just convince myself that all the above is really true, maybe I could let go with fewer tears.

Have a blessed day!